Surviving each day can be difficult when you are going through separation and divorce. Your whole life seems to have been turned upside down. Maybe it’s over analysis of each time you have spoken with your ex. Maybe it’s just trying to work out what has gone on in the past. For me it was a lot about working out what will happen in the future – what is my life going to look like? Is she going to be part of it? Where am I going to live? Who gets the house? Do I need to start somewhere else completely different? Who can I talk to? Who are my friends going to be?
We talk about this day-to-day survival of separation and divorce on the RDS course regularly. One phrase that we use and that I still keep coming back to regularly in my life is this one from Winston Churchill “only one link in the chain of destiny can be handled at a time”.
It is so important to just think about today’s choices. What can I do today? What will help me today? I find it so easy to start thinking about what might happen in a month’s time or a year’s time which is not helpful. Stay in the present. Notice the moment. Only one link in the chain of destiny can be handled at a time.