This morning, three children opened their Christmas presents in front of their Mum and Dad.
For most parents, this thankfully won’t feel like an extraordinary event. However, for my ex-wife and me, this was the latest milestone in what has been a remarkable journey. Last Christmas, we were barely speaking to each other. My 9 year old twins won’t remember the last time we celebrated Christmas together: they were only 2 at the time.
The purpose of my first blog isn’t to chart the journey that got me to this point, which would have been unthinkable even 6 months ago. I learnt to forgive, and move forwards – and not be dragged by the past. I also realised how perceptions and miscommunication had gotten in the way of us co-parenting effectively. It was as if in interpreting my ex’s communication, I was assuming that she didn’t have our children’s best interests in mind (as mad as it sounds now). I will write about this in future blogs, drawing out the various lessons that I learnt in the hope that some may prove helpful to others.
I just wanted to share a message of hope on this Christmas Day, and encourage you all to persevere in reaching the point where you can both be present for the days that matter for your children.
My biggest gift this year didn’t come wrapped They were the words of my eldest as I kissed him goodbye: “this has been my best Christmas ever, because I was able to share it with Mummy and Daddy”. Never has a journey felt so worthwhile.
So I wish you all a very Merry Christmas, and pray that you don’t give up hope that you can reach soon a better place, even if the outlook currently feels bleak.