I was driving my car this morning and was cut up badly by a small car driving in a very crazy manner. I so wanted to get back at him somehow. He had honked his horn at me and I at him. He ended up being in front of me and I was left behind.  I thought of how few times you ever do “get back” at someone who drives like that – I never do in my experience.

It’s a similar feeling to anyone who ever wants to “get back” at their ex for doing something bad to us. Maybe we can use something that they want, like access to money or access to the kids – but it never really satisfies. Retaliation never compensates for what we have lost or been hurt by, it’s so ineffective. Often all that happens is the pain and hurt just stays inside us and grows within us.

We talk a lot about how to get rid of those painful feelings on the RDS Course.  There are ways of getting rid of that pain and hurt that doesn’t involve retribution or any sort of punishment. Letting go is a difficult choice but one that leaves us free and able to move on successfully. More importantly I have seen many, many people do it and transform their lives.