Blog

Christmas – there is a hope

This morning, three children opened their Christmas presents in front of their Mum and Dad. For most parents, this thankfully won’t feel like an extraordinary event. However, for my ex-wife and me, this was the latest milestone in what has been a remarkable journey. Last Christmas, we were barely speaking to each other. My 9…

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Celebrating your birthday single parent style

Birthdays are hard once separated or divorced. It can feel just like any other day and not special at all. Especially if you have young children. There’s no one there to take your children to get you a gift, card and cake. Or to make sure it’s wrapped and a surprise. Or to organise waking…

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Mother’s Day as a single mum

Tomorrow is Mother’s Day. As I’ve written before, I find this day bittersweet. This is my tenth Mother’s Day alone now. I suppose I’m a veteran now? If that’s a good thing? When my marriage ended I definitely assumed by now I’d have met the man of my dreams and be settled again. Maybe another…

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Valentine’s Day and being Single

After a long day at work and collecting the kids from playscheme, tonight on the way home I saw a man come out of a florist with a big bunch of flowers, presumably for his partner or wife to surprise them in the morning and my heart just sunk.  I won’t have a card or…

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When your ex remarries

On Saturday I waved goodbye to my children so they could watch their Dad remarry in a civil ceremony. It felt very strange and almost surreal but I wanted them to feel they had my permission to enjoy the day. It was 2009 when we separated, but despite the length of time since the pain…

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Restored Lives should go global

Restored Lives should go global: I was living in Singapore when my marriage broke down and it would have made my journey to recovery (and most importantly, that of my children) so much smoother. Not long after I came to London two years ago I read an article about the course. Initially I didn’t think…

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I thought I was living a wonderful life

I thought I was living a wonderful life. I had just been given a new car for my 25th wedding anniversary, we had two brilliant children and a beautiful home. We worked hard together in two businesses and had life’s normal ups and downs.  We had several stressful attempts at infertility treatment and I had a…

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Mother’s Day

I’ve really struggled with Mother’s Day since divorce at times. This will be my fifth one on my own.  (Yeah I’m counting). To the point that I now actually make a deliberate choice to stay away from Facebook on that day, as I find all the status updates or pictures about how spoilt they’ve been,…

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What can we learn from Nelson Mandela?

There is a new film out on Nelson Mandela who was an amazing man. Much written about him, but is there anything that we can learn from him about going through a relationship breakdown? From South Africa’s perspective the relationship between black and whites had completely broken down, so much so that there were rules…

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Ten tips for getting through Christmas

Christmas can be such a tough time when you are separated or divorced.  Every advert seems to be about the “ideal” family and the pressure to create the perfect Christmas feels huge, especially if you have children. Perhaps you are facing your first Christmas alone or without your children for the first time or maybe…

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